So you have had your little bundle of joy in your life for about 2 years now, and boy have you learnt a lot in that short space of time. You are a pro at this parenting thing. You look at your past 'new parent self' the person who had prepared every small detail before the arrival of their baby. Who always made sure that there were at least 300 nappies in the house (and car) and 20 packets of wipes. The person who packed emergency changes of clothes, anti-bacterial gel and towels for those 'just in case' moments. When you think back to that person you smile smugly and may even chuckle a bit. All those preparations you made when they first arrived, have now either been used, put to one side or buried under a mountain of other random crap (mainly generated by your not so tiny bundle).
You now live each day as it comes, dashing to the shops just minutes before they close to get an emergency packet of wipes because your little one has just done a poop so horrifically violent that it has shot up the back of their baby grow and is now in their hair. Or digging through the cess pit (formally known as your boot) at 6.30am in order to find a clean nappy.
As your children grow older, you get used to their day to day traits and have become quite skilled at keeping them clean enough to get by in polite circles. The over preparation (as you now see it) has now become a thing of the past, half because you feel that you no longer need to do it, and half because you simply no longer have the time. The only situations that seem to truly require over preparation, are holidays or weddings. But for those small trips to the super market or into town.... HA! You laugh in the face of danger. You know you will get to the shops and back in under an hour and will get by with 3 wipes and a semi clean Starbucks napkin. You know that car journey will take only 20 minutes and that there are supplies at your destination should you need them.
Then it happens, the little snot-bag you call your beloved decides to drop the mother load. No nappy without cast iron straps and webbing is going to hold in what they have decided to produce. Or it's worse than you could have predicted and you look to the back seat of your car to find that your little darling has not only covered them selves in vomit, but their sister and the lovely bouquet of flowers you were taking to their grandparent's house as a gift. "Sorry Nan, we were bringing you flowers and chocolates but all we now have for you is two very smelly children (one who is now wearing a bed sheet as a toga as it was all that we could find in the boot of our car) and a box of chocolates that must never EVER be opened".
When these moments happen and you ask yourself where did all the 'just in case' supplies go? Where is that bag full of spare clothing, the spare nappies, the baby wipes and all the other emergency items. You know the one you packed when you made that first terrifying journey out of the house with your newborn.
Then you kick yourself as you remember when you used all the 'just in case' supplies for the times you were too tired or lazy to get some more (cue slow patronising clap offered by passed self).
We have all been there, and those who are new to the game, you will be there too one day, stood at the side of a main road trying to decide what will soak up the most vomit - your brand new t shirt or that pillow case that has somehow managed to find it's way into your boot.
Never underestimate your child's ability to throw you into a complete flap. They let you believe that they have a manageable routine that leads you into a false sense of security. It's all a facade my friend, don't fall for it! Learn from our mistakes (today's mistakes in actual fact - as Dan and I sit here writing this, shell shocked in our pajamas after having scrubbed ourselves clean with more antibacterial soap than you can shake a stick at).
Pack an emergency bucket for the house AND the car, and once it is packed LEAVE IT! Treat it a bit like a first aid kit and replenish it when stocks are low. Going by our experience you will need:
Alcohol gel
A towel you don't mind binning after use and/or a roll of kitchen towel
Nappies (make sure you get the next size up!)
Wipes
Carrier bags
Rubber gloves (for the faint hearted)
Dust masks (this one seems OTT but you will still need to get home and so will be stuck in a small box that stinks of vomit and your little one probably won't want the windows open with the wind blowing in his or her face).
Child's size baggy t-shirts
Child's toothbrush and toothpaste (we find these really help our older one to feel a bit better).
Keep this in your car at all times and hopefully you won't ever have to go through what we went through today!
Danielle and Steve.
P.S
Sorry it has been a while, this whole parenting thing has sort of taken over a bit lately!
